A New Life

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Source: www.housing.com

#StartANewLife

The past is deep, as they always say. And life is a bouquet of surprises. It hurts and wounds but time heals it all. My life too has been a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. I was once the most loved and cherished daughter of our village. Though not really pampered by my three brothers, I was considered important and dear. Our mother always trusted me more and let me handle all the responsibilities. I was the one to guide the others to do tasks and I took immense pleasure in ordering them around. And then one day a groom was chosen for me from the many proposals that always kept coming in. The marriage took place after they had my consent, and off I went to my in-laws’ leaving my home behind.

It was a happy start of a new life, far from home, nearby the rocky beaches of Mumbai. A new chapter of my life had begun with someone who respected me, whom I was happy to be with. But one cannot judge a person in a matter of months. Every smiling face is not happy inside. I understood it the hard way through a nasty game that fate played with me. After just a year to our wedding, while we were in a vacation visiting our family and relatives, one day a news suddenly shattered all my dreams of a blessed married life. He was no more. He had poisoned himself in the spur of a moment loaded with stress and issues I had no idea about.

I came back to the same village after a period of shock, grief and mourning. People came one after the other every day to talk to me and cheer me up. They loved me and cared about me, I was sure of that, but they also tactfully avoided my path early morning or before the onset of a journey. I was a widow. I was unlucky. They couldn’t risk encounter me even accidentally lest my luck should transfer to them. Relatives tried to console me when I was down, and whispered new proposals to mother when I was not to be seen.

Then one day something inspired me to stop withering away in self pity and make an attempt to set life on a new track. Motivated by these thoughts, I arranged the required documents, draped a good cotton wear, and went to the village school to inquire about any vacancy in teaching positions. I wanted a job to divert my mind from all things negative, and thankfully got one. My days got better from there. I healed and learned to let go. Pursuing my passion as my profession brought back my lost confidence and restored my faith in God. I also resumed my tuition classes for secondary and high school students. I earned respect and admiration from students, fellow colleges and parents. I saved a lot for months together and finally renovated our old house. It felt so good to see mother and brothers beam with joy and pride.

P.S: Hope this story about starting a new life would be an inspiration to those embarking on a journey of their own.

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Queeristan by Parmesh Sahani

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  Queeristan (Amazon Link) Thanks to Audible Free Trial I listened to this amazing non-fiction on LGBTQ inclusion in Indian workplaces. Author Parmesh Sahani identifies as gay Indian, working closely with Godrej higher management and employees for years to create an inclusive workplace, both legally and in spirit. This book is a result of those years of experience, research, collaboration with individuals from difference spectrum of the society and organizations who has successfully transitioned into a queer friendly one.   Indian history is inclusive. From the Khajuraho temple architectures, to Konark to the Rig Veda, there is existing proofs even 2000 years ago of Indian inclusiveness of queer. It’s the draconian British law that criminalised it, which was scraped in 2009, came into effect once again following a sad judgement in 2013 and eventually was scraped off for good in 2018. I am in awe of the lawyers who fought this legal battle- colleagues and partners – Arundhati Katju
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